April 6, 2012
Sometimes the creativity flows and sometimes it doesn’t. Learning to move out of your own way and just let things flow can be hard at times.
I’m facing that with my book right now. I know this story inside and out, but writing it is a challenge at the moment. I keep having to stop and ask myself, “What do I want want to happen? What do I want the character’s motivations to be?” I keep telling myself that I have to be the first audience for the story and that I am writing the story for me.
I was working on a study painting last night (I’ll try to get a picture of it up next week). It’s not anything marvelous, just me playing around trying a couple new things. But as I was painting it, I realized that I had to make myself happy in painting it. If I wasn’t happy, then no one else would enjoy it either. I was the first viewer. I knew what I needed to do, but I had to allow the painting to come. Even more, I had to let myself experiment and play. I kept telling myself that it wasn’t going to be a great masterpiece — it wasn’t intended to be. It took awhile to get out of my own way and allow the process of me painting to overcome my critical tendencies.
It is so hard sometimes to trust the energy of the universe, to trust the process, but once we settle in and allow ourselves to be in the process, it is amazing what flows. For me, the easiest way to do this is to ask myself what I want. In my heart, I already know that answer. If I don’t follow what I want, there is no way I can authentically share my art with others without feeling judged already.
How do you trust the process? Is this something you know you need to do more of and are you ready to try now?