Nebula on a hexagon

My six-sided painting. I was pretty excited to find this canvas. I knew immediately that I wanted to do a space painting on this. Once I felt ready, I painted the canvas black. The picture above shows it all prepared and ready.

My first layer:

It’s hard not to block a painting in like this and not absolutely hate it and fear that it’s been messed up. But, the painting must continue.

Here’s the next layer:

Now we’re getting some of the misty cloudiness into the piece.

In the next layer, the stars start to shine:

More layers come next, more stars, and adding some of the black of space back in. Finally we end up with this:

There was a point at which I really messed everything up. I didn’t grab my phone to take a picture though; I knew my paint was drying quickly. That probably returned the fun to this painting. I’d started to take it too seriously and quit having fun with it. In causing a catastrophe on the canvas and knowing I had little time to fix it, I had to attack it with courage and release everything. Believe me, at the time I really wasn’t sure I’d be saving it. It was extremely hard to release the fear. Words make it sound so easy, but at the time it was horrible. I instantly projected myself into the future where I had to paint the canvas black once more to restart and regretted the past where I wished I hadn’t touched it so much. I was everywhere but the present.

Grounding yourself with courage puts you firmly in the moment. There’s an obstacle that must be overcome and only by stepping forward can this obstacle be hurdled.

This painting could have easily gone the other way where I did have to go through the future of repainting it that I had imagined. However, I’m glad I kept working it and gave myself the chance.

As my friend, J.D. Estrada, said a few days ago on an Instagram post, “Self doubt is an option, but so is believing in yourself.”

This weekend, believe in yourself.

Happy adventuring!

Landscape painting – WIP?

I’m starting this post for the second time. I went off in one direction and realized that it was a whole separate post. You’ll get it later in the week. You’ll know it when you see it because it’s about playing around. I think that was exactly what I needed to do when I started that post, along with solidifying the lesson in my head.

After all, these aren’t just pep talks for you, though I do hope they help and that you find some value in them. Often, they are present me giving future self advice: hey dummy, you learned this lesson once already; aren’t you ready to move on already?

But that’s not what we’re here for today. Rather, I thought I’d show you a piece I’ve been working on.

I’ve mentioned in a couple prior progress posts that I had been painting, but I never showed any pictures. So here’s one.

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It’s a 5″x7″ acrylic on Bristol board (though you can see my margin notes to myself which I haven’t erased yet). It’s also not quite as dark as it looks here. This looks almost like a blocked in painting. Sorry.

I “finished” this piece quite some time ago and I’ve been meaning to varnish it. I’d hoped to have it matted and framed for the last show I did, but I couldn’t get there. I wonder if that’s the process telling me that I’m not done with it yet. It all feels very symmetrical to me. I can’t stop the nagging feeling that it needs something. Maybe that’s why I haven’t been able to finish it yet. Maybe it truly is a work in process still. Am I learning to trust the process with my painting as well as my writing?

Time to pull out the charcoal and/or the sketchbook and start trying some ideas. Wish me luck.