Progress – January 28, 2019

There are some weeks when I am just tired. Last week was one of them.

In trying to reboot my painting, I have several decisions to make. That lead me, of course, to research to find tools that will help me and that, obviously, leads me to testing several different tools to see which one(s) I like.

What frustrates me is that I had a tool I liked. It had years of data in it. I did want to clean it up some, maybe divide the database. But because of changes in technology, the program doesn’t work quite right any more. The company that developed it still has a website that for the last two years has asked for patience while they update their systems — they want to move to a cloud platform. However, I’m not sure they are serious about that any longer. I have exported the artwork data from the program, but it’s not easy to import without a lot of cleanup, mapping fields, and making it fit a new program.

With that experience, I don’t want to start something else that could potentially disappear or become obsolete. Which makes me think about paper files — good until a fire, or flood, etc.

So, it makes me leery to pull the trigger on anything. I don’t want something I will just end up rebuilding in seven to ten years. I realize that technology changes and that we have to have forward movement, but it seems like everything always needs constant updating and when a business no longer wishes to continue, they just close up. No one wants to build for a legacy, only for the current moment (and dollar, though I’ve read that the average lifespan of a solid business is about 30 years). It makes me tired.

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Progress – September 3, 2018

I probably should have written this during the morning when I was all pumped up and ecstatic. I’m starting to feel that this is a Sunday routine for me where I start the day all excited and by the time I sit down to write this, I’m depressed as can be. Yes, honest moment there.

And yes, I often have to pick myself back up to write this blog.

There’s a big fly in my office and I wish it would die. I want it to get trapped in a spiderweb and become dinner for another species I don’t particularly like. Yeah, it’s that kind of depression day.

Maybe it’s the episode of Star Trek: TNG that I had on a little while ago. Maybe it’s just a cycle that I go through. Maybe I feel that I’m not as productive on Sundays as I wish I were and I imagine myself being during the rest of the week. Maybe it’s the story I’m writing that now has me emotionally tapped. Maybe I intuitively feel that I’m not doing something right in my life and this is when it tries to surface. Maybe I need more time off to recharge. Maybe I see all that needs to get done that I haven’t gotten to. Maybe I feel like this is a record of what I got done while I let other things in my life go by the wayside knowing I should be tackling these tasks too.

Yeah, this is how I feel on Sunday evenings. 

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